Scripture and waiting

Why wait for sex

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What does God think about sexual activity before marriage? For Christians, behavior in a dating relationship isn’t driven by passion or the advice of friends. The bottom line is what Jesus thinks about it. The “mini” Bible studies which follow will help you to determine, confirm or change your own convictions about God’s perspective on sexual activity in dating. You might want to use these questions as the basis for a Bible study with the person you’re dating or with your small group.

  1. Jesus said concerning Satan that “there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies” (John 8:44). What are some of the values or beliefs accepted by those around you which are contrary to the specific truths of Scripture? What spiritual lies cause you the biggest struggles in your own life? How do you personally respond to the prevalent belief that premarital intercourse is a right, a need or an expectation? How does your conviction in this area affect your behavior?
  2. “But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people” (Ephesians 5:3). Why do you suppose Paul connected sexual immorality, impurity and greed in this command to the Ephesians? What are some “hints” of immorality that you have seen in your own life? Does it challenge you, discourage you or give you hope to think that your behavior reflects (for better or worse) that you are one of God’s “holy people”?
  3. “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure” (Hebrews 13:4). What does “pure” mean as it is used here in relationship to sex? Why do you think God says that marriage is to be honored? Why is purity important? In what ways would you like God to help you stay pure (or be restored to purity) before marriage? In what ways do you hope that God is helping your future spouse to stay pure?
  4. “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see” (Hebrews 11:1). Define faith in your own words from the perspective offered by this verse. In what ways is sexual behavior in a dating relationship a matter of faith? In what ways do you wish you had more faith in your life right now? How do you think God might want to give you more faith in the area of your sexuality?

— Alice Fryling

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